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I heard from a holy soul today...paraphrased:
Speaking about how people get hung up on wanting to know why bad things happen she said, "knowledge is a form of control.  You think it will give you power over it.  You have to accept your powerlessness.  Pain is one of the few things that gets our attention."

Asking why bad things happened doesn't give you power over it and doesn't change the suffering at all.  A better question is, "What now Lord? What is your response to this?"  God loves us and always has a response to our situations and sufferings.